


not alone

by lostnthedream (falloutangel)



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Gen, Kihyungwon Bingo, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Single Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-31
Updated: 2019-01-31
Packaged: 2019-10-19 20:05:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17608052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/falloutangel/pseuds/lostnthedream
Summary: Hyungwon was there when Kihyun suddenly became a father.





	not alone

**Author's Note:**

> kihyungwon bingo prompt: single parents
> 
> three out of four for kihyungwon bingo! the mega fic is being posted tomorrow! (it's way better than this one so please check it out!)
> 
> this is unbetad and I wrote it really fast so don't be too critical. go check out my other bingo fics, I put a lot more effort into them owo

Hyungwon is on the floor with Changkyun, watching the baby move his trains back and forth when he hears the familiar sound of keys unlocking the door, signaling that Kihyun is back from his day at work. He pulls Changkyun closer, looking over at the front door as it swings open.

 

“Look, it’s your dad!” Hyungwon exclaims, pointing at Kihyun as he holds the baby. “You’re home early.”

 

“Don’t call me that,” Kihyun mutters, but smiles at Changkyun, taking him from Hyungwon, bouncing him in his arms. “I told you that it’s Ki, remember?”

 

Hyungwon sighs, but nods. He doesn’t really understand Kihyun’s aversion to being called a father, but he’ll press that later.

 

“But yeah, Hyunwoo let me go early because he had a dinner meeting to go to. There was barely anyone left in the office anyway.”

 

Hyungwon nods, standing up from the floor and groaning at the ache in his back. Changkyun babbles happily in Kihyun’s arms and Kihyun smiles, rubbing his head and nuzzling his little cheek.

 

“Have you guys had dinner yet?” Kihyun switches Changkyun to his other hip, walking to the kitchen.

 

“Not yet.” Hyungwon trails behind. “I would usually start making it now, but since you’re here…” Hyungwon lets his words linger, and Kihyun rolls his eyes.

 

“Yes, Hyungwon, I will make you dinner.” Kihyun kisses Changkyun on the cheek before passing him back to Hyungwon. Hyungwon pulls out a chair from the kitchen table and plops the seven-month-old on his lap, smiling down at him.

 

Hyungwon was there the day Kihyun suddenly became a father.

 

Hyungwon wishes he could think of that day as happy - the day that Changkyun came into his life. However, he can’t see it as anything other than the day that Kihyun was told that his only living family had died in a car accident. The day that he had to drive Kihyun to the hospital only to hear the doctors tell him that his brother didn’t make it through surgery.

 

They had just had a baby -- a son now five months old, who was shockingly unharmed in the deadly crash. Changkyun.

 

Dowon and Minah had left Kihyun as his guardian in their will. Kihyun had thought of it as an honor at the time. Hyungwon remembers how he won’t shut up about his new nephew, bouncing happily around Hyungwon’s kitchen.

 

“Hyungwon, what am I going to do?” Kihyun has whispered against his chest as Hyungwon held him there, no answer to be able to offer.

 

“You’re Yoo Kihyun,” he replied. “You always figure something out.”

 

And he’s strong. So unbelievably strong, Hyungwon sometimes can’t imagine how Kihyun adjusted to quickly. In less than a week Kihyun’s apartment was suddenly baby proof and ready. He’s tried to help as much as he can because Kihyun’s small support system had just shrunk once more and now he has the responsibility of caring for a child. An infant, at that.

 

Hyungwon didn’t even want to think of the rest. Kihyun how had to deal with social work, the lawyers, the will, the funeral…

 

If Hyungwon taking care of Changkyun for a few hours a day helped Kihyun even a fraction, he was ready to do it in a heartbeat. He’d never thought of himself as good with children. Now he has to be. For Kihyun.

 

(It’s a sobering experience to remember Kihyun’s excitement to have a nephew. How he was so happy that his family was growing. Years after his parent’s deaths, finally moving to something better.

 

Changkyun is now all he has left.)

 

Kihyun works out his schedule so he can take Changkyun to daycare in the mornings. Hyungwon is able to pick up Changkyun from daycare at five, thanks to his job working night hours as a club DJ, giving Kihyun the ability to keep his job at Hyunwoo’s firm as his assistant.

 

So after daycare, Hyungwon brings Changkyun back to Kihyun’s apartment and watches him until Kihyun gets home from work.

 

Kihyun was hesitant about it at first because he’s always hesitant when it comes to relying on people too much. However, Hyungwon is insistent, knowing with Kihyun that he has to be.

 

They’ve fallen into some kind of routine. Kihyun manages somehow to not look like a complete mess even if he’s only gotten an hour of sleep because of Changkyun’s screaming. Hyungwon has now taught himself how to cook several meals, even if half of them are just preparing baby food.

 

Kihyun hums some pop tune while he cooks fried rice. Hyungwon tries to keep a baby entertained by counting his toes for the fifth time. It’s comfortable, but Hyungwon can’t help but yearn for more.

 

He had been planning to confess his feelings when the car crash tore Kihyun’s life apart, leaving him in pieces with a thousand new responsibilities. Hyungwon knew that it wasn’t the right time to do anything. He just needed to be a stable friend, someone to lean on without any risks.

 

He thinks that having Changkyun to care for definitely helps the older, while at the same time being a large burden on his shoulders - not to say that Kihyun doesn’t love Changkyun with every inch of himself, but anyone can see the stress and grief wearing down on him.

 

Hyungwon knows he’s trying to stay bright. Because that’s who Kihyun is. Bright and steadfast and strong. But Hyungwon can see the cracks.

 

He decides that he needs to continue to be that sturdy presence in his life. He doesn’t need any out of the blue confessions. Hyungwon can be okay with that for now.

 

After dinner Hyungwon puts Changkyun in his crib to sleep, hopefully for several hours, coming back to Kihyun in the kitchen.

 

“So,” Hyungwon starts, leaning on the counter, “why don’t you want him to call you ‘Dad’?”

 

“Because I’m not his father,” Kihyun says, drying the plates in the sink, not looking up at Hyungwon.

 

Hyungwon would like to disagree. Kihyun does everything and more for that child.

 

“I’m not going to replace Dowon. I can’t.” Kihyun looks at Hyungwon and Hyungwon can see the cracks in his walls, exhaustion and pain shining in his eyes. “He’s my baby, but I’m not his dad. I’m just…”

 

“Ki,” Hyungwon finishes.

 

Kihyun nods.

 

Hyungwon sighs, letting the argument drop.

 

“I’ve thought about it, Won.” Kihyun turns around, back to the sink. “The thought of him calling me that… I don’t want it. It’s doesn’t feel right. Ki feels right. Because I’m not his dad or his mom, but I’m here. I’m here for him.”

 

“Okay,” Hyungwon says, ducking his head. “I’m sorry that I kept pressing it, I won’t call you his dad anymore.”

 

Kihyun nods, grateful, and turns back to the dishes.

 

Three days after his first birthday, Changkyun’s first word is “Ki” and Kihyun doesn’t stop smiling that day. 

  



End file.
